Where's The Ice In My Dreams?

Are u effing kidding meh?!
His mother is such an angry woman, everything gets on her nerves & it all seems to revolve around meh lately. Like last night, this didn't revolve around meh but it was still mad funny.
We came back from the park, she started screaming about plastic bottles & water. I'm not too sure. It scared meh.I actually jumped when she got out of her chair & rushed into the kitchen. He took a water bottle to the park & apparently she wanted him to take another type of bottle that wasn't bendable & not durable. She cares all about the environment so she recycles & uses reusable grocery tote bags.

So I really like ice, it's all I eat or I must have it when I drink something.
I just heard all this commotion downstairs. I pause my Hollywood Undead song to hear what's going on? She's bitching about ice. "All I know is there is never any ice" I was thinking "oh shit. I messed up again."
Kay, that's partially my fault. I got up at 5am to go downstairs & some mandarin soda with lots of ice. I tried to not make a lot of noise so I didn't bother to refill the container the ice is kept in after it's removed from the ice tray. I did that thing his mother showed meh where you twist the tray to make the ice come out instead of just banging it against the counter like us unsophisticated country folks do :D It worked. I got happy inside but there was no one to tell. I was like "see, I'm not completely hopeless"
Ugh, I feel like I'm doing everything wrong when I'm here. I'm making too much noise, running too much water, eating too much ice, touching things I'm not suppose to, talking too loudly, being too strange. I just wanna be perfect for him & his family & we all know that is never gonna happen. I can't even be half way perfect for myself. I am so glitched.

Speaking of perfect, like the first thing i heard this morning when I woke up was "what's wrong with your teeth?" Will was laying in bed next to meh, he had already been up for about 3 hours, starring at meh. I'm like what do u mean? I thought he meant the coloring (kinda yellowish in the A.M.) & gross film I have on them when I wake up before I brush my teeth. He's like they're crooked. I'm like "yeah? They've always been crooked" Where has he been for almost 9 months?! He said I didn't know they were that crooked. He asked did that happen last night? How?! I was only the in the car for two hours. What could have possibly happened? I was like "oh whatever"

And I've been having dreams, more like nightmares.
The night before last I dreamed that Will & I were having a baby (highly unlikely) & his parents were not cool with it, when we told them. They went ballistic, his father finally threw his two cents in, it was odd to hear him talk. He never says ANYTHING to meh. He only knows I'm crazy from what his wife tells him. They both started screaming at us, mostly meh about how I'd be such a horrible mother to their grandchild.
His father: "She's psycho, she's not fit to be a parent, are u guys crazy?!"
His mother was like "gawd, how could you be so stupid Will?!"
It went on for like an hour. It was torture, even in my dreams. Kay, I'm officially afraid of his parents now.I know it was just a dream & my crazy mind over imagined it but gosh.
.
It's weird b/c I've been wanting a baby since a month after I met Will. That's strange. I swear I never wanted children til I met him. I don't know what went off in my head, I was baby crazy for like 5 months. I think in my head I feel like a baby will gimme a happy family & make my sucky life a bit better. I don't know. I'm really confused. Now that his mother hates meh, wouldn't it be great to throw a baby in the picture?! The look on her face when we told them, jaw dropping to the ground, veins popping out of forehead. It would be hilarious. I wanna play that joke on them just for the hell of it but then I could never come over here again. I'm already not welcomed.


Then last night I dreamed that something was trying to kill meh. I really couldn't figure out what it was but it was similar to The Mad Hatter, Johnny Depp's character in Alice in Wonderland mixed with Freddy Kruger from Nightmare on Elm Street. I couldn't sleep or it would get meh. It was even there when I opened my eyes. I ended up walking all night then finally running in front of a car to kill myself. CRASH! Then I was dead & I saw my bloody body on the pavement. I had to rid myself of that evil.

I'm officially insane, like his mother has drove meh over the edge. Or maybe it was him. I'm not sure but I don't like where I'm going...

He's like I just want you to & my mother to get along. We did until she read my blog. It's like my diary. I don't care if it's online, it's not easily found by my settings unless you're in the FBI. If it wasn't for fucking PrettyThin & not being able to set profiles to private. I'm never gonna get over her doing that to meh. I only said those things b/c she screamed at meh for cutting myself in her house. That was so fucking inconsiderate. It's my body, I didn't get blood anywhere & I told her I wouldn't do it ever again. Guess what?! I haven't. She overreacted, so I did & now she's gone look down on meh forever. This shit is just fucked up if you ask meh. She already thought I wasn't good enough for them.I gave em something else to hate meh for. Stupid Brittanie!